» Wednesday, January 29, 2003

So, I'm in the shower and I get to thinking about fear dot com, as you do.

(Spoiler ahead, if you're an idiot and you actually care)

The movie suggests that feardotcom.com is a site run by a psychotic woman-mutilating murderer who tortures his victims until they beg to die. We see him talking to his web audience, and we know that the murders are all web-cammy. The "twist" is that "the fear site" our hero visits is not the self-same — it's run by the ghost of his first victim.

Ahh. You can't make that stuff up. Anyway.

Either way — serial killer or vengeful wraith — I have this image of them tapping furiously at register.com. "what do you mean fear.com is taken? Oh, man."

"Okay, fear.org. Damnit."

"Fear.net."

".biz."

".tv?! No fucking way. Fear.tv is NOT taken! Jesus, I'm gonnna kill EVERYONE! FINE. I'll take feardotcom.com or is THAT taken too? Yeah, I didn't think so. Fuck you, internet."

Clearly, they should have included that scene. The movie would have been so much better.

» Thursday, January 09, 2003

What can I say? Unemployment breeds indolence. I am often disinclined to put on pants and behave like a grownup. But I figured it was about time I got around to wishing everyone a happy new year. I'm not lazy.

This economy makes me really quite crankers, but aside from all this onerous free time, I couldn't be happier.

I had a delightful New Year's Eve in the lodgelike comfort of Kirk and Mo's house, and chased it with a weekend at the cabin with my people, which was completely super. Limerick, Maine, at this time of year, is a winter wilderness wonderland. Truly, I haven't seen such snow in years.

The trip began with one minor misfortune after another, including water leaks, uncertain heating systems, unplowed roads, hungry bellies, and sundry calamities. Eventually, we were all snug as fed bugs in the heated cabin, with a roaring fire courtesy of my eminently capable boyfriend. It's funny the things you learn about people in atypical situations. It turns out that Brad is something of a perpetual boy scout superhero. Seems like anytime I observed a problem, Brad had already noticed and was halfway to solving it. Amazing.

We all sat by the fire, roasted a chicken, became saturated with the musty smell of a summer cabin locked up for the winter, played numerous games (with varied results), and no one fell in the lake. All in all, I'd say it was a great weekend.

And now we're back, and I'm still high from the fun. So, yeah, I don't have a job, and the money's running out fast. But at least I have great friends. And if I lose my apartment, my boy scout can probably build me some sort of emergency dwelling in the woods.